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Stuff Archive -
Big Wheel
Sledgstone - 19 Jul 2003 01:24 pm
Post subject: Big Wheel
ok. the following is partial introduction/story to the cologne that caused
hilarious tales and events throughout my teenage years. 
it all started one christmas
long ago, i was turning 15 i think the following day (my b-day is Dec 26 for
those of you that don't know). and i usually recieved b-day & christmas
presents on the same day. anyway, my uncle game me a present that was oddly
heavy and and he told me to open it on my b-day and that it'll help me with the
ladys, so i opened the present the next day and i was like, wtf.. low and behold
here was a bottle with a label that read 'Big Wheel' on it. i didn't know what
it was at first and then i realized the bottle itself looked like a big wheel,
if you can see a pic of it you'll notice the sides of the bottle have treading
too. lmao. so what would be your first reaction to getting a bottle of cologne?
you open it and smell it. so i opened it... and passed out. when i woke up 5
minutes later i noticed the bottle was still in my hand and the lid wasn't even
all the way off and it did not spill (thank god).
a couple weeks later,
i told my friend kelly about it (kelly was a large friend of mine back then, he
was pretty cool). and i told him about the strength of Big Wheel. he stayed the
night on a weekend soon after (we did that kinda thing back in the day, stayed
up till all hours of the night playing video games n sh*t). and i introduced him
to Big Wheel. i opened the bottle and we didn't pass out (the fumes must have
been building up over the years to cause my passing out from the initial
opening) and let him take a smell. his eyes watered and almost cried.
thats when we came to the conclusion that that i was given a weapon of
great power. we assumed that my uncle could not control it any longer and
probably felt it was better if he passed it on. keep in mind this bottle was not
new, it was something hes had and used for the past 50 years and was still
moderatly full.
we thought of possible scenarios for using Big Wheel.
one great plan was to take a small bottle (about the size of pinky toe) and
break it against the floor of a crowed movie theatre if the move we were
watching sucked. more schemes came to mind.. then we figured after a while, ppl
will become aware of Big Wheel and begin to fear its power. that would be when
we would walk into gas stations and demand money, and when the cashier would
deny us, we would simply show a small flask of Big Wheel and the employees would
cower in fear and meet our demands.. after those initial tests, we would then
move onto a grander scale and start taking over the government. how could anyone
possibly stop us with Big Wheel? they couldn't. we'd be unstoppable. because Big
Wheel was the sh*t.
There was even plans to take out the empirial army
with Big Wheel. tie fighters and star destroyers wouldn't be able to do a damn
thing after we attacked them with Big Wheel loaded proton torpedoes. we even
thought yoda's crippled arse could incorporate Big Wheel into some sort of jedi
attack (this was before episode 2 came out and found out that yoda could
actually take care of his own).
anyway, i could go talking on & on
about Big Wheel because the amount of Big Wheel stories that were made were
insane. but i'll stop for now and say a few more words.
when i moved to
NY, i left Big Wheel behind. i figured if anything went wrong and the Big Wheel
somehow leaked or exploded in the heat of the 9 hour car drive, that all my
possesions would be ruined and i would probably die. just last month, we made a
trip to ohio to see my parents new house.. my brother told me he had something
for me to see and walked me into one of his rooms. there it was. Big Wheel. and
danny told me that he now has the power and responsibility to safegaurd the Big
Wheel. (we eventually came to the conclusion that we should make sure that Big
Wheel never fell into the wrong hands thats why danny now has the
responsibility). so there it is. Big Wheel. the all powerful.
i figure
that since he hasn't opened it in a couple years that he should not open it
again period, save he doesn't get killed by the concentrated smell. i figure
that someday.. a thousand years from now, somebody will find that bottle and its
concentrated big wheelness shall destroy the world.
lets pray that day
never comes to be.
and that is the story of Big Wheel.
coolkam007 - 19 Jul 2003 01:32 pm
Post subject:
.. i feel a flash movie comming on..
too bad i dont know how to use
flash -_-
DeathscytheX - 19 Jul 2003 01:41 pm
Post subject:
! that was a great story
Aroura - 19 Jul 2003 01:42 pm
Post subject:
Crescent ZERO - 19 Jul 2003 01:43 pm
Post subject: Re: Big
Wheel
| Sledgstone wrote: |
| i figured if anything went wrong and the Big Wheel somehow
leaked or exploded in the heat of the 9 hour car drive, that all my
possesions would be ruined and i would probably
die. |
LMAO!
So that's the story behind it. Do
they still sell it?
Sledgstone - 19 Jul 2003 01:50 pm
Post subject: Re: Big Wheel
| Crescent ZERO wrote: |
| Sledgstone wrote: |
| i figured if anything went wrong and the Big Wheel
somehow leaked or exploded in the heat of the 9 hour car drive, that
all my possesions would be ruined and i would probably
die. |
LMAO!
So that's the
story behind it. Do they still sell it? |
i honestly don't know. and even if they did, i highly
doubt it would ever be as strong as the 50 year old bottle my brother now
possesses. 
DeathscytheX - 19 Jul 2003 02:07 pm
Post subject:
yes they do!!
http://shopwynns.com/fuller/big.htm
http://www.zteam.com/collip.html
 < what a great box and fresh new
look
coolkam007 - 19 Jul 2003 02:13 pm
Post subject:
im totally buying some, and keeping it in a safe.. forever, just so i can have
the weapon, incase i need it
buy several, and let them sit for
20 or so years.. then very very carefully pour some into a super soaker..
slippers - 19 Jul 2003 04:00 pm
Post subject:
ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Strider Hiryu - 19 Jul 2003 05:50 pm
Post subject:
ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sledgstone - 19 Jul 2003 05:58 pm
Post subject:
i remember me n kelly decided that our battle cry would be....
BIG
WHEEL!!!
*throws flask of Big Wheel*
ah yes.. theres
that wonderful bottle.
DeathscytheX - 20 Jul 2003 01:56 am
Post subject:
BIG WHEELKRIEG!
Duo - 20 Jul 2003 02:09 am
Post subject:
some how the wheel just reeks(not smell wise no pun intented) Of old school
ac....
Kiteoto_Shenlong - 20 Jul 2003 02:15 am
Post subject:
: : :: :: :: :: ::
I miss the
old school AC...with eppy's perversion...my semi new member smell...the absolute
activity, where if you weren't on for two days it's like you missed an eternity.
Duo - 20 Jul 2003 02:21 am
Post subject:
| Kiteoto_Shenlong wrote: |
:: :: :: :: :: ::
I miss the old school AC...with eppy's perversion...my
semi new member smell...the absolute activity, where if you weren't on for
two days it's like you missed an eternity. |
kick arse funny enternity too! something hilarious like
that!
Sledgstone - 20 Jul 2003 10:14 am
Post subject:
| Kiteoto_Shenlong wrote: |
:: :: :: :: :: ::
I miss the old school AC...with eppy's perversion...my
semi new member smell...the absolute activity, where if you weren't on for
two days it's like you missed an eternity. |
ah yes. those were the days. those days will return
eventually tho... and when they do, and you don't know it.. you'll all miss that
eternitiy of funness in a 24 hour period.
dark_templer_102 - 20 Jul 2003 05:30 pm
Post subject:
Big Wheel is some knock-out weapon if left alone for 20 years
well sledge, u guys going ot do
anything to big wheel....and have u even sprayed it on ur self ?
Kiki - 20 Jul 2003 06:33 pm
Post subject:
He he he! My friend's younger brother just turned 13 or something so he's trying
to be all cool and get girls, so he sprays on axe effex(or something) But he
doesn't just spray it, he like bathes in it, everything in her house smells like
it, their cars smell like it and once when he was out at like 2 in the morning
(we have a 10 curfew law for minors in my STUPID city) the police came and like
sent dogs on him and his friends, but he hid in the bushes and they couldn't
find him because he was just drenched in ax effex. Yah, I touched the bottle and
he was like 'No! I just bought that!' And I was like Wow.....
dark_templer_102 - 20 Jul 2003 06:40 pm
Post subject:
ur were supposed to be turned on
Vyper - 20 Jul 2003 06:58 pm
Post subject:
AXE, due to it's high pressure nature, is a very good flamethrower
I have some of it too
and it's quite powerful.. one could think I bathe in it but I spend a second -
two seconds spraying X_x
I wonder what'd happen if we burned some Big
Wheel...
*strokes chin in thought*
Crescent ZERO - 20 Jul 2003 07:58 pm
Post subject:
Don't do it! Burning Big Wheel would spread the toxins faster than people could
stand!
Azrael - 20 Jul 2003 08:18 pm
Post subject:
Hmm...do I smell a villainous extortion scheme?
Kiki - 20 Jul 2003 09:19 pm
Post subject:
Burning Big Wheel would probably cause the highly concentrated yet highly
volatile compounds to explode releasing combusting molecules of Big Wheel no
larger than an atom, which would then turn into plasma burning through any and
every substance known to man-kind prior to exhausting its resources thus ending
its chain reaction of nuclear fission.
Duo - 20 Jul 2003 09:46 pm
Post subject:
mmmmh axe tusunmai...*dies* I love that smell, I went to work smelling like it
the other day accidently  I guess I shoulda showered
after I came home from my friends...
Crescent ZERO - 20 Jul 2003 09:51 pm
Post subject:
Did you get mobbed by hordes of women that day? 
Duo - 20 Jul 2003 09:53 pm
Post subject:
Unfortunatly not....*dreams* thats okay I like my perfume besides I don't think
mens cologene suits me, vanillia much better
dark_templer_102 - 20 Jul 2003 10:01 pm
Post subject:
big wheel fumes = as much farting for 6 years staright = atomic bomb
Duo - 20 Jul 2003 11:33 pm
Post subject:
| dark_templer_102 wrote: |
| big wheel fumes = as much farting for 6 years staright =
atomic bomb |
what ever happen
to that did it get deleted?
Crescent ZERO - 20 Jul 2003 11:36 pm
Post subject:
It's in the Humor forum.
Duo - 20 Jul 2003 11:48 pm
Post subject:
we have a humor forum!!!????!!!?!?!  
Bishie - 20 Jul 2003 11:53 pm
Post subject:
Oh gosh, with proper capitalization that story could go in Reader's Digest ^_^
Kaede - 21 Jul 2003 03:21 am
Post subject:
cologne so acrid it makes you pass out...happened before. That happened when my
cousins first started using cologne...I passed out at a party, good thing in the
bathroom by myself, and then ppl wondered what was taking me so long. I guess
they didn't hear the thud.
cologne so pungent it makes your eyes water.
What a great way to be reunited with my cousin from Maryland. I teared up like
when someone opens a really hot oven. I felt blind for minutes.
Sledgstone - 21 Jul 2003 07:15 am
Post subject:
| dark_templer_102 wrote: |
| big wheel fumes = as much farting for 6 years staright =
atomic bomb |
| Bishie wrote: |
| Oh gosh, with proper capitalization that story could go in
Reader's Digest ^_^ |
you
think so? i'll tidy it up and send it to them. ^_^
Jase - 21 Jul 2003 09:51 am
Post subject:
dang man, that was one odd story. 
Vyper - 21 Jul 2003 12:17 pm
Post subject:
*drops match in flash and closes it up really quick*
*hugeromongous
explosion happens and after the explosion a black hole forms and starts sucking
everything in*
Crescent ZERO - 21 Jul 2003 01:21 pm
Post subject:
At least we can use the black hole as a new garbage can.
Angeldrg227 - 21 Jul 2003 03:22 pm
Post subject:
dark_templer_102 - 21 Jul 2003 04:30 pm
Post subject:
Sledgstone - 24 Jul 2003 11:43 pm
Post subject:
lol. i made this an announcement so i wont forget to archive it!
Crescent ZERO - 24 Jul 2003 11:51 pm
Post subject:
I was wondering why it was at the top all of a sudden...
Ladywriter - 26 Jul 2003 10:37 am
Post subject:
i just run the other way if i see the bottle
Kaede - 27 Jul 2003 04:47 am
Post subject:
| Sledgstone wrote: |
| lol. i made this an announcement so i wont forget to
archive it! |
What would be
the difference?
Sledgstone - 27 Jul 2003 09:33 am
Post subject:
| Kaede wrote: |
| Sledgstone wrote: |
| lol. i made this an announcement so i wont forget to
archive it! |
What would
be the difference? |
announcements don't get auto-pruned. this way, when i see
the topic hasn't been replyed to in a while, i can archive it real quick. ^_^
Kaede - 28 Jul 2003 09:44 pm
Post subject:
 *smacks self on
head*
Sledgstone - 28 Jul 2003 11:40 pm
Post subject:
lol. 
gotta love
that smilie. ^_^
cfioncn - 29 Jul 2003 03:19 pm
Post subject:
Maybe that would explain
the cats in the ye olde 'Sledge n pussy' post.
I use the Lite version:
Not-quite-as-big Wheel.
Sledgstone - 29 Jul 2003 09:52 pm
Post subject:
| cfioncn wrote: |
Maybe that would explain the cats in the ye olde 'Sledge n pussy' post.
I use the Lite version: Not-quite-as-big
Wheel. |
Kaede - 30 Jul 2003 10:19 am
Post subject:
| cfioncn wrote: |
Maybe that would explain the cats in the ye olde 'Sledge n pussy' post.
I use the Lite version: Not-quite-as-big
Wheel. |
With less pungent
ingredients?
Mecca - 06 Aug 2003 05:23 am
Post subject:
Oh my god... I think my grandpa has some of that... *twitch*
cfioncn - 06 Aug 2003 11:37 am
Post subject:
yep. with 30% less fat! ^_^
Hampstergeddon - 14 Aug 2003 04:00 pm
Post subject:
does this get you mobbed by hordes of ladies?
or is it just your charm?
cfioncn - 14 Aug 2003 07:50 pm
Post subject:
| Hampstergeddon wrote: |
does this get you mobbed by hordes of ladies?
or
is it just your charm? |
A-.....AAAAAASIAN CHARM, FOO'! 
actually, no...but it might
explain the damned mosquitoes 
Hampstergeddon - 14 Aug 2003 07:52 pm
Post subject:
perhaps boyish good looks?
cfioncn - 14 Aug 2003 07:55 pm
Post subject:
..........o shit........triple post .....i clicked 'submit', and my
browser just kinda milled around without doing anything at all, so i thought the
packet hadn't been sent out yet......sorry, sledge
Ladywriter - 14 Aug 2003 08:26 pm
Post subject:
*Lady fix*
Azrael - 14 Aug 2003 11:29 pm
Post subject:
Love the new
rank.
Sledgstone - 15 Aug 2003 06:46 am
Post subject:
dahahaha!
cfioncn - 15 Aug 2003 08:19 pm
Post subject:
| Ladywriter wrote: |
| *Lady fix* |
thanks, lady.....for some reason AC was extremely slow
yesterday...
Sledgstone - 19 Aug 2003 11:44 pm
Post subject:
*archives this topic* 
| cfioncn wrote: |
| Ladywriter wrote: |
| *Lady fix* |
thanks, lady.....for some reason AC was extremely
slow yesterday... |
cpanel upgrades and patches caused that.
End of Topic.
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