Saiel - 09 Mar 2003 08:52 pm
Post subject: Cecil and Cecille
(As most people have been asking me how to pronounce each name...Cecil=See-sill. Cecille=Says-sill)
(I'd really appreciate some critiquing, even though it's kinda long~thanks!)
Cecil and Cecille met in May
The sun shone out
With bright, warm rays
Birds sang with smiling hearts
June was filled with Summer's scent
Cecil and Cecille played their games
Days came, Days went
While birds built nests with patient hope
Sultry July made sweat gush forth
Clothes were scarce
Cecil and Cecille's words were short
Birds breathed out a lusty tune
The moon in August grew like mad
Lit up the night
Orange hues danced with red
Cecil and Cecille felt they could fly
Cecil and Cecille thought September strange
All dressed in browns
While warm winds came
Birds nestled to bed in pairs
October's blush released its sigh
Cecil and Cecille quit their games
True feelings shone with greater light
The birds were packing Summer's score
An odd new scent November brought
Perfume of flowers
Cecil and Cecille whiffed it out
Birds arranged their parting scene
December's icy wind chilled hearts
Revealed the truth
Love poisoned before its start
Cecil and Cecille squabbling incessant
Cecil and Cecille's January stung
Their lips spat dry
Long-held caresses undone
Birds were nowhere in sight
Trapped in February's frozen embrace
Cecil and Cecille lost their minds
Between them fire consumed love's space
Their bird sat, cooing in the dark
The Ides of March--an ironic date
Accusations never-ending
Cecil and Cecille knew each other's fate
Birds returned with battered wings
April's scent was less than Spring
But more than mold
Lovers controlled by a fling
Cecil and Cecille intrigued the worms
Cecil and Cecille met in May
On this spot
Or so they say
The birds have used them both and flown away.
Heir of Silence - 09 Mar 2003 09:09 pm
Post subject:
Obviously no offense intended, but my first thought is '...what the hell?'
Interesting, and of intriguing thought.....I'd feel better if you'd explain it to me, though
Aroura - 09 Mar 2003 09:36 pm
Post subject:
Sweet! I love it! Wonderful way to write a poem. it sort of reminds me of 'ickleme pickleme tickleme too'.
Azrael - 09 Mar 2003 09:43 pm
Post subject:
I got it! Yay!
Good poem.
Saiel - 09 Mar 2003 09:43 pm
Post subject:
| Heir of Silence wrote: |
| Obviously no offense intended, but my first thought is
'...what the hell?' Interesting, and of intriguing thought.....I'd feel better if you'd explain it to me, though |
Hmmm...well, no offense taken, but I'll try to explain...whatever needs to be explained...
So it's basically split into groups of three months...May, June, and July are the two meeting and just kinda hanging out and flirting...August, September, and October are them falling in love. November, December, and January--they start to get suspicious of each other (the flower perfume being from another girl,) and then February, March, and April they've just given up and plan to...off each other.
The fourth line of each stanza has the birds just representing what's going on in their relationship at the time. The very last line...well, to be blunt, after they killed each other, the birds ate up all evidence that they'd ever even existed.
I think that's all I've got to explain...if not, just say so. ^^
And thank you, Aroura.
Edit: And thanks, Azzie, too!
PitViper33 - 11 Mar 2003 03:02 pm
Post subject:
Your poetic style seems to be changing....
I really like it.
Anime Pimp - 12 Mar 2003 09:56 pm
Post subject:
I love it.
Saiel - 12 Mar 2003 10:00 pm
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| PitViper33 wrote: |
| Your poetic style seems to be changing.... I really like it. |
Like the poem...or the change? 'Cause one of those isn't particularly nice...
But thank you all the same. ^^;;
| Anime Pimp wrote: |
| I love it. |
Thankies.
Heir of Silence - 12 Mar 2003 11:18 pm
Post subject:
I really do like it
Do the birds have any symbolism, though? I hate to become a nuisance, but I dunno
PitViper33 - 12 Mar 2003 11:40 pm
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| Saiel wrote: | ||
Like the poem...or the change? 'Cause one of those isn't particularly nice... But thank you all the same. ^^;; |
I like the poem. Does that mean that I like the change? I don't really know. I was just acknowledging it.
Saiel - 15 Mar 2003 02:24 pm
Post subject:
| Heir of Silence wrote: |
| I really do like it Do the birds have any symbolism, though? I hate to become a nuisance, but I dunno |
Hmmm...well, it's sort of just like, the birds' actions are reflecting the two's relationship at the time...or Cecil and Cecille's bird-like actions are. I can't really think of any *deep* way to put it...
Dunno if that's a bad
thing...though for the most part, the birds are representing the happiness of
their relationship, until they come back and are changed, the way the
realtionship has...uhm...I suck at explanations. ~_~;;
Ladywriter - 16 Mar 2003 01:31 pm
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i like it the way it is n i think is sweet
Saiel - 16 Mar 2003 01:37 pm
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| Ladywriter wrote: |
| i like it the way it is n i think is sweet |
Thank you!
End of Topic.