Anime Pimp - 09 Mar 2003 02:07 pm
Post subject: Loving Razor
Loving Razor
Slowly, I raise the sharpened blade
to the blemished skin I've made.
As the blade cuts my skin, I'll fade;
fade away in a sea of pain.
When I bleed there's a rush of bliss,
taking me to a place I've missed.
There will be no remorse for this;
my prayers are not in vain.
This drug inches slowly down
and continues forth without a sound.
It once subdued this ornate frown
but now can scarcely keep me sane.
This is my only escape;
my empty dreams will soon take shape.
It saves me from my fate that looms,
uncertain doom; it will not wane.
So, again I pay my fees;
I cry and fall down to my knees.
Bleed with me, or let me be.
I await my pain.
-- another in an unfortunate series of depressing poetry. It still needs work, methinks.
Ladywriter - 09 Mar 2003 02:39 pm
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in happen to like suicide poetry.
Aroura - 09 Mar 2003 07:49 pm
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Really good, very well writen, but so sad ;.;
Saiel - 09 Mar 2003 08:36 pm
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Very nicely done...I love the 'Bleed with me, or let me be' line.
Fate - 10 Mar 2003 05:23 pm
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very well written...
I especially like stanza's 2 and 3
I think its stanza 4 that needs rearanging or something....
but even if you don't change it, its still a beautifully, sad poem
Anime Pimp - 12 Mar 2003 09:55 pm
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I didn't follow the rhyme scheme in that stanza. I'm not quite sure why, actually. =\
Umm, thanks for the compliments.
Total Trinity - 13 Mar 2003 09:17 am
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Pimp, that was one of the most depressing poems that I have ever read and... I really liked it!
~Total Trinity~
Azrael - 13 Mar 2003 10:13 pm
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Dark.
Anime Pimp - 13 Mar 2003 10:22 pm
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Word.
You guys are nice.
Allie - 13 Mar 2003 11:07 pm
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!!!!!1
OOOOOOO me like me like!!! ehehe *bows* sorry! im just a BIIIG fan of depressing
poetry!!
Total Trinity - 15 Mar 2003 03:28 pm
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| Allie wrote: |
| !!!!!1 OOOOOOO me like
me like!!! ehehe *bows* sorry! im just a BIIIG fan of depressing
poetry!! |
You're weird, but I like it.
~Total Trinity~
darkangleofdeath - 04 May 2003 04:58 pm
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dude word extream deep man
End of Topic.