Saiel - 09 Apr 2003 09:16 pm
Post subject: *shrugs*
(Sometimes when I don't feel like going to bed, I stay up and write...but that doesn't mean I write anything really good...^^; I did this the other night out of boredom, just for fun. I want a better word than 'rubber' in that second to last line, though.)
The rubberband
SNAPS
Flying outside
A guilty hand
SMACKS
A counter-
The stinging subsides
Puzzle-filled faces
MOAN
At the sight
Your writhing plump tongue
GAGS
On rubber
Stopped dead in its flight
SNAPS
Flying outside
A guilty hand
SMACKS
A counter-
The stinging subsides
Puzzle-filled faces
MOAN
At the sight
Your writhing plump tongue
GAGS
On rubber
Stopped dead in its flight
PitViper33 - 09 Apr 2003 09:41 pm
Post subject:
Go ahead. Call me dumb. But I don't get the smack part.
I do think it's kinda neat though. I sure wish I could just 'whip something up' like that.
Eli - 09 Apr 2003 10:58 pm
Post subject:
lol its good saiel..it leaves you thinking just what the heck happened hehe
dark_templer_102 - 09 Apr 2003 11:51 pm
Post subject:
i wish i oculd write this good
well i think its great 
Noin - 10 Apr 2003 02:33 am
Post subject:
beautiful.. you need like a black beret and a striped french t-shirt.
with some like jazz music playing in a club while you say that.
Eli - 10 Apr 2003 04:03 am
Post subject:
lol coffee shop Noin
Noin - 10 Apr 2003 03:04 pm
Post subject:
yeah... just wherever there's an ambient mood followed by the
sounds of snapping fingers to go in rhythm with each said line.
*puts on retro shades*
groovy.
Aroura - 10 Apr 2003 07:10 pm
Post subject:
Hehe, free verse. Fun stuff
Anime Pimp - 14 Apr 2003 06:51 pm
Post subject:
Fun.
darkangleofdeath - 04 May 2003 04:53 pm
Post subject:
cool
Total Trinity - 05 May 2003 08:26 am
Post subject:
Schway!
End of Topic.