Archives > Wonderland 2003:
Wonderland Archive - a poem

Allie - 18 Nov 2002 03:50 pm
Post subject: a poem
erm..well i kinda changed a word in this poem..but ill post the original..

~~~~
I feel so abused by your touch,
that you assume this is not such.
A faint memory in my mind,
is all that you may find.
Let me tell oyu something,
my love is more than nothing.
But to my my heart in your hands,
is like to find a precious shel in the sands~~~~

REVISED!

I feel so soothed by your touch,
that you assume this is not such.
A faint image in my mind,
is all that you wil find.
Let me tell you something,
my love is more than nothing.
But to put my heart in your open hands,
is like a precious shell in the sands.



okay which one do you guys think is better.....personal opinion!!
Amadeus - 18 Nov 2002 04:01 pm
Post subject:
I prefer the second best, but that depends on how one goes about interpreting the poem I guess.
Either way, both are good.
Allie - 18 Nov 2002 07:38 pm
Post subject:
you are like the only person who has interpreted it the way it was supposed to...thanks ^_^
Guyver - 19 Nov 2002 10:48 am
Post subject:
i kinda liked the top 1 sweatdrop.gif
Azrael - 19 Nov 2002 11:03 am
Post subject:
Well, the one word kinda changes the meaning of it, so...I guess it just depends on the tone you want. They're about equal in my eyes.
td yuy - 26 Nov 2002 10:02 am
Post subject:
i like da first one,i have a thing for abuse sweatdrop2.gif
anyway,both poems are really nice icon2.gif
Amadeus - 26 Nov 2002 01:21 pm
Post subject:
It's amazing how just changing a couple of words can virtually completely change the meaning of a poem
Total Trinity - 20 Jan 2003 05:35 pm
Post subject: I like #2
I like the first one. But I guess it all depends on your mood at the time. Like, normally I would like the second one but I'm ina bad icon11.gif mood right now.

NEway, They are both good.
Fate - 21 Jan 2003 04:06 pm
Post subject:
Personally I like the 2nd one
I guess I can relate to it better icon7.gif
End of Topic.